Hryhoriy Nestor from the Ukraine was 116 years old when he died in his sleep on Friday. Before his death, he would tell people that the reason he lived so long is that he never got married. Ah, even old people have a sense of humor.

Really, I think he was trying to live long enough to hear someone pronounce his first name correctly.

Friends and family of the old geezer said that he never got married because he was too short and had no money – it wasn’t his choice. Wow… I’m sure he would have been really happy to hear such nice things from his family.

I think the old man was right though – 116 years as a bachelor. No woman sitting there and nagging at you over empty cans and toothpaste stuck to the inside of sink. No woman bitching about pubes around the toilet bowl rim or crusty socks wadded up in the corner. If all men did was party and live carefree lives without wives, we would probably never die.

I think this guy was in the Karate Kid.