Annie Lobert and Heather Veitch gave up spreading their legs and accepting penis into their mouths. Now, they spread the word of God and accept Jesus into their mouths… I mean lives.

Annie is an ex-prostitute and Heather is an ex-stripper. Together, they formed the groups JC’s Girls and Hookers for Jesus. The group is aimed at helping women who are forced to have sex and/or strip for money. This is not a joke.

“Like, oh my God, we should totally preach the word of that Jebus guy!”

The born-again Christians visit strip clubs and pay for private dances, where they talk to the dancers about God… exactly the opposite of what you’re supposed to do in a private dance. Annie Lobert says, “We don’t preach to them and we’re not judgmental. We tell them that God loves them, even if they are hookers or strippers or porn stars. We offer help and advice.”

Umm… isn’t that called preaching?

If God can’t help me make a student loan payment, do you think he’s going to help a prostitute with AIDS have a better life? God hates you and it’s as obvious as the knee pads you’re wearing under those spandex pants.

“Wait! You don’t have to suck that dick. I heard your prayers!”

I can’t help but feel that the wackiness of this idea is just an attempt to gain fame and truly makes a mockery of the Christian faith. I’m not one to complain though because I think Christianity is a mockery of human intelligence.

Whatever their intent, I’m sure that Annie and Heather will help many strippers and hookers find new jobs. A “saved” prostitute can currently choose to restart her life as a Hooters waitress or cosmetologist. Flight attendant, massage therapist, and pre-school teacher positions will be available soon.