I remember going to the snack machine in high school and wishing that I could press B-4 and get a nice fat sack of reefer. Sadly, I had to bring my own instead and hope that my English teacher, who looked like a German Shepard, couldn’t smell like a dog as well.

California is paving the way for medical marijuana users with new weed-selling vending machines. Not just anyone can buy pot from these machines; people will have to have a prescription and they will also be fingerprinted and photographed. If you pass the screening, you can buy 3.5 or 7 gram baggies of homegrown medicinal chronic – and you even get to pick from 5 different strains ranging in taste and potency.

Future machines are expected to sell prescription pills like Viagra, Vicodin, and an assortment of antidepressants.

I’ve never wanted to have a terminal illness so bad in my life!

“So umm… how bout some of that weed now?”

Hopefully this is a big step towards legalizing marijuana for recreational use. Either way, this is a huge kick in the nuts to all those anti-medical pot asshole lawmakers. Next, we should all light bags of baby shit on fire and put it on their porches.

Anyone want to join me on my crusade?