“Ladies and gentleman, we will now be departing from Haiti’s airport on our nonstop flight to New York. Please make sure all of your luggage is secure and your seats are in the upright position. If you have any serious illnesses, such as heart disease, and require oxygen, please notify one of the flight attendants. They will be glad to argue with you over it for an hour and then give you an empty tank, leading to your untimely death. Thank you, and have a nice flight.”Carine Desir, 44, wasn’t expecting to die 35,000 feet in the air on Friday when she hopped aboard an American Airlines flight 896 to return home from Haiti. During the flight, she started feeling ill and had difficulty breathing - she was actually experiencing heart failure.Carine was denied a portable oxygen mask from a flight attendant until other passengers became agitated by the situation and convinced the cockpit to allow her access to an oxygen tank… which was empty. The flight attendant brought out a second tank, which four medical professionals on the plane tried to administer but couldn’t because that tank was empty also.”During the event of a drop in cabin pressure, place this mask over your face and pray to God that it works.”Her last words were reportedly, “I can’t breathe.”We need to revert back to the days when you could smoke on airplanes, have sex in the bathrooms, and flight attendants were hot blondes called “stewardesses.” Back then, it was acceptable to make testicle jokes to the stewardess when she asked if you wanted complimentary nuts.Back in those days, it wasn’t all about cramming people into a plane and hoping nobody hi-jacks it with a box cutter. People just don’t care about others’ needs anymore. The last few times I’ve flown, I’ve had a gay male flight attendant who wouldn’t even fluff my pillow or bring me a spritzer no matter how hard I flirted with him - I even popped a boner and asked him to buckle my seatbelt.”Can you please hand this water to the dead woman next to you? Thaaanks!”