If you haven’t heard by now, Eliot Spitzer (hehe), is resigning as Governor of New York after being called out on charges of fucking prostitutes. David Paterson is prepared to take over Eliot’s governorial duties – minus the hookers – as Eliot is supposed to resign today. For your information, I just made up the word “governorial,” so I’d like some credit if you ever plan on using it.

I don’t understand how someone can “resign” from a position that they’re going to be fired from anyway. Is it a polite way of allowing the man to reserve some of his dignity? He’s been exposed to America as a dirty, bald pervert – I don’t think he has any dignity left.

The investigation began after Spitzer’s bank notified the IRS of some fishy activity going on. This lead to the FBI getting involved, tapping phone conversations, and eventually uncovering the fact that Spitzer had been moving large sums of money around to cover up his filthy habit.

Spitzer spent several years as an attorney general, prosecuting people for the same financial crimes that he’s probably going to get stuck with – smell that sweet irony. Let’s look up the word “hypocrite” in the dictionary:

Why do I have the feeling that if we replaced every politician in our country with a person who is mentally retarded, there would be less corruption and more creative budget spending? I’m all for it.