March 28, 2008

“Man” gets knocked up

Ladies, have you ever woken up one morning and felt something terribly wrong with your mental health? You can’t quite pinpoint it, but you feel like the source of your stress and anxiety is possibly the fact that you don’t have a penis. Then you come to the realization that you’ve wanted to be a man your whole life. You want to burp, fart, drink beer, scratch your balls (and then your face), and harass women. Who wouldn’t want to be a part of that culture?Thousands of women have surgically altered their gender and ended up getting married to “straight” women who don’t seem to mind their lover’s situation; It’s what’s inside that counts my friend - it’s not the peel, it’s the banana.”I am so obviously a woman.”If your name is Tracy Lagondino, then you’d end up getting gender reassignment and changing your name to Thomas Beatie. Then you’d marry a woman and spend the rest of your life looking exactly how a stereotypical butch lesbian looks, except with surgically removed breasts and some facial hair that grows in patchy due to testosterone treatments.Thomas recently shocked the world after writing an article for the gay magazine The Advocate, telling about how she, err… he is pregnant with a baby girl and due to give birth in July.”It’s perfectly natural.”Apparently, when you have gender reassignment surgery, you still have the option to keep your reproductive organs. Thomas chose to keep his internal lady parts, and after his wife had a hysterectomy, he decided to be artificially inseminated and carry the child for her.I remember seeing a movie with Arnold Shwarzenegger called “Junior,” where he gets pregnant and carries the baby all the way until birth. Luckily, it was a C-section - I don’t think anyone could handle seeing a newborn ripping its way through those muscular buttcheeks.”Get to da choppa! It’s not a tumor, it’s a baby.”Thomas’ neighbors have voiced their disbelief about the pregnancy. One neighbor said, “I couldn

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4 Comments »

  1. i'm just wondering how and when they are going to explain this to that poor child…

    Comment by me! — March 28, 2008 @ 1:19 pm

  2. You're welcome! :wink:

    Comment by michelle — March 28, 2008 @ 4:08 pm

  3. eeeeewww!

    Comment by cortnie — March 28, 2008 @ 11:12 pm

  4. Holy god that's the largest man belly I've ever seen.

    Comment by Whit — April 1, 2008 @ 3:55 pm

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