Some things should just stay lost forever
I’d like to take a minute of your time to talk about something really annoying - shutter shades.
Shitter Shades!
These pieces of shit were once popular for a short while in the 1980s, but they resurfaced when a French designer, who I’ll call Fefe LeFuckstain, customized a pair for Kanye West.
First of all, what the fuck? People need to realize that not everything from the 80’s was cool. AIDS got big in the 80’s and when Magic Johnson got it at the height of his career, you didn’t see a bunch of his fans running around trying to get AIDS too.
I look at Kanye West and think, “There’s a man with so much fame that he could wear a lettuce leotard and everyone else would start doing it too.” But then I realize that a leotard made of lettuce is fucking insane and I would never be caught in public with it on. Maybe at home when nobody’s looking, but never in public.
I’m just going to take a random myspace kid and make fun of him for a second.
Wow, congratulations. I’d give you a trophy, but I haven’t finished shitting it out yet. I wish cocks could stretch like taffy because I would strangle this kid with his own dick until his head popped off. I think a better idea would be to wear these glasses on your ass and walk backwards because you’d look less like a fuck.
I know some of you reading this are thinking, “But Dustin, I like shutter shades lol, I even own a pair!”
Don’t worry. I’m not going to disown you as a friend. Just know that every second you’re in front of me and wearing those things, I’m getting closer to picking up a hammer and smashing them all over your stupid face.
I think a lot of times, people make mistakes and don’t realize it until they look in the mirror. In this case, many of you are too busy taking myspace photos to actually see just how fucking stupid you look. If you really need a good excuse to take your shitter shades and throw them into a black hole forever, here you go:
This is what you look like. You can be ashamed of yourself now. Thanks, Paris.
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Dustin @ 8:03 pm |
Wow, thank you so much for this. I completely agree. There's no point in this ridiculous trend. Shutter shades are ugly. Period.
Comment by Elana — June 26, 2008 @ 8:20 pm
Finally.
Comment by Korbi Kay — June 26, 2008 @ 8:21 pm
ooo thanks for addressing this issue!!! these things are fucking annoying not to mention hideous!!! uhh i can't believe people actually wear these….
Comment by danielle — June 26, 2008 @ 8:26 pm
hahahahah<3
Comment by cakeface — June 26, 2008 @ 8:31 pm
Buwahaha, /signed :laughing:
Comment by Shelby — June 26, 2008 @ 8:35 pm
Next stupid thing that will resurface will be the ..Swatch Watch…Anybody here remember those fucking things? And the idea was to wear at least 3 of them. Just looking at those retarded glasses makes me puke!
Comment by Mental Case — June 26, 2008 @ 8:57 pm
This will be my first and last comment on the site…..I just tried some of these on like 30 minutes ago at tillys.
Comment by devin — June 26, 2008 @ 9:14 pm
wtf… those things are awful. just awful. don't worry. you'll never see me wearing a pair of those.
Comment by Angela — June 26, 2008 @ 9:47 pm
Fuck,i have to comment again.God how i REALLY HATE PARIS HILTON. Just look at that moldy uterus. And those fucking tard shades!! That useless bag of dick glue.
Comment by Mental Case — June 27, 2008 @ 12:48 am
thank (all that is holy) i'm not the only one that hates these! i guess people will follow any fashion statement now a days…even if it makes them look retarded. (have you seen they have them hanging from necklaces too?)
Comment by noelle — June 27, 2008 @ 2:51 am
:laughing: Oh man, you are a funny one.
Toucheeee.
Comment by Nikki — June 27, 2008 @ 2:58 am
My girlfriend and i saw a pair of these the other day and i just wanted to kill the person who made the popular, i didnt know that kanye west made it cool, but what a fag… i fucking hate those things too
Comment by matt — June 27, 2008 @ 3:19 am
Think of it this way: The dumbasses who wear them are 10 BILLION percent more likley to flounce off a cliff due to vision imparmanent… That and a nice juicy "friend" lodged in their butts.
Comment by Kim! — June 27, 2008 @ 4:20 am
hi im 6 and i have never seen these before. but they look like something my butface brother would wear.
Comment by Blake — June 27, 2008 @ 12:53 pm
only bros wear stuff like this!!
Comment by molli — June 27, 2008 @ 9:41 pm
i hate those things. -_-
Comment by Maria Concepcion Rodriguez de Jesus — June 28, 2008 @ 2:43 am
I can't saying because I can't stop laughing :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:
Comment by B — June 30, 2008 @ 9:36 pm
They were selling these allll over warped tour and everyone was wearing them too. I dont get how u can see out of them.
Comment by Alicia — July 1, 2008 @ 2:33 pm