You can finally resume your lives
posted on July 7th, 2009 by Dustin at 9:32 pm (EST) with 14 Comments
What’s the difference between a grocery bag and Michael Jackson? One is plastic and hazardous to children, the other holds your groceries.
Could it be? Is it finally over? Will we finally be able to watch TV, browse the web, and listen to the radio without being reminded that Michael Jackson is dead?
WE GET IT. He was awesome, OK? How many more times do I have to hear the SAME EXACT WORDS from a thousand different people? I don’t usually get annoyed easily, but JESUS FUCK, can we please not talk about Michael Jackson anymore?
I’m all Jackson’d out!
The MJ Memorial wrapped up earlier today and everyone is ready to release his body back to Mother Earth, where it will definitely be preserved until future civilizations excavate his massive 14k gold coffin in 5,000 years and mistake him for an Egyptian king.
MJ’s actual coffin. I wonder how many people will try to dig this thing up.
Bonus: In most English speaking countries, a casket is a small box for holding jewelry, while a coffin is a box for burying the dead.
Tell that little fact to your bitch Math teacher tomorrow and she’ll shut right up!
3AM Edit: You can imagine my joy when I saw this headline on Google News’ front page.
I officially hate the media more than AIDS.
14 Comments - Leave One!
Tags: Annoying, Michael Jackson —
Comments
Comment from Baby
Time July 7, 2009 at 10:14 pm
Lol seriously!
I hate how everyone hated him and made fun of him, then he dies and they all act like he was their favorite and shit.
Comment from RockNRollAGoGo
Time July 7, 2009 at 11:03 pm
Honestly, I couldn’t care less the man is dead… He was a creep
Comment from Gaby
Time July 7, 2009 at 11:56 pm
i feel like shooting my tv.
every music channel has michael jackson shit on until about 9:30 tonight, and seeing im in australia, its 2:54 pm now, and its been going all day, so thats a long time without some sort of variety of shitty music or mtv shows.
Comment from Guugley
Time July 8, 2009 at 3:32 am
Yup… Who cares, MJ was a tool IMO and he should have died along time ago…
Comment from metal_mistress6669
Time July 8, 2009 at 5:36 am
I am a HUGE HUGE HUGE MJ fan!!
But I agree with u, get over it already
Im sitting here watching MASTER CHEF for christ sake coz im sick of all the michael Jackson stuff on the other channels.
But i still dont agree with people being disrespectful and saying he deserved to die.
Everyone should just chill and move on
Comment from Texzen
Time July 8, 2009 at 8:29 am
I honestly had no respect for the man in the first place, much less any LAST respects to pay. To watch the “black community” praise and glorify such an idiot was simply more than I could bear. When someone intentionally leads their life in such a morbidly disgusting way, HOW on God’s green earth can you give a eulogy with a “straight face?” If it were an honest eulogy would it start something like this? ” We are here to TRY and honor a plastic surgery addict that resembled “chucky” from the horror films.. and a “father” that really had no business being within 10 miles of a child.. A man that blew his fortune on some of the stupidest shit a person has ever seen.. ” I mean really, when you have little to no value as human being, are you really “worth” a ceremony like that? If so, I can hardly wait till Charlie Manson dies!! Imagine THAT send off!! Reckon Al Sharliton will be there??
Comment from Kyle :p
Time July 8, 2009 at 8:38 am
wait wait wait wait……..Michael Jackson died?
Comment from PATRICK
Time July 8, 2009 at 9:26 am
the maggots are gunna be fuckin pissed when they find his body. theres no real flesh to eat. poor maggots
Comment from amanda
Time July 8, 2009 at 10:59 am
i was tired of it 10 minutes after the fact. Yes, he music was lovely…he wasn’t. I was really hoping that after he was put in the ground it would all be over 
so i share this joy knowing that he will not just “fade away.” It just tickles me to death knowing that all this MJ…um…confusion? isn’t over yet. Gosh. LOVE IT!
Comment from Shannon
Time July 8, 2009 at 12:14 pm
While I like MJ’s music and don’t think he was a child molester, I couldn’t help but laugh at that joke!
-What did the mother say to Michael Jackson at the beach?
…
-Get out of my son!
See? Though I feel bad about his death, I can’t help but take part in the telling of Michael Jackson jokes.
Comment from Dj. G
Time July 8, 2009 at 1:25 pm
well, he’s in real deep now. i meant in the earth, not your 10 year old child.
Comment from ilikemylifesoidonthateonrandoms
Time July 9, 2009 at 10:33 am
“Yup… Who cares, MJ was a tool IMO and he should have died along time ago…”
@ Guugley
You’re a sick fuck
Plus you just read this whole article and than commented so you’re pretty much Michael’s bitch.
I bet you’re fat and hate your life.
See ya!
Comment from Lucy
Time July 9, 2009 at 1:35 pm
The coffin was ridiculous!
I do have respect for him, although it would be nice for people to shut up about him 
Comment from mj
Time July 7, 2009 at 10:01 pm
I’m all Jackson’d out!
LOL