FLORIDA — Police arrested a grandmother and her boyfriend this week for trying to sell her grandson to an undercover agent for $30,000. Investigators said the child was on clearance after being originally placed on the market for a rapacious $75,000.

65-year-old 45-year-old(?) Patty Bigbee and 42-year-old Lawrence Works are being charged with the illegal sale or surrender of a child. The baby’s mother was not involved in the incident because she was already in jail for something unrelated.

Authorities set up a sting after learning about Bigbee’s intentions from an informant. Only a crazy person would ever pay $75,000 for a child from her shallow end of the genepool, so the undercover agent bartered with her for fun.

Bigbee finally settled on $30,000, even though the most sought-after illegal newborns from Kenya don’t even cost that much. She was arrested immediately after the rendezvous, along with her boyfriend, although he was just there for security.

The baby was turned over to child welfare officials, and will hopefully have a new family soon. If not, that sucks, but I don’t have time to write a sob story about an orphan.

Sources: 1