FLORIDA — If you ever happen to accidentally travel through the shithole city of Opa-Locka while on your way to Miami, make sure your pants are pulled up if you get out of the car.

Wednesday night, the city of Opa-Locka voted to fine people $250 if they sag their pants.

Even though this law unjustifiably targets young black males, most people don’t question it because the man leading the crusade against saggy clothes is also black.

City Commissioner Timothy Holmes implemented the ban on saggy pants in 2007, but there were no big fines for violating the public dress code until now. “Dress like somebody. Be somebody,” Holmes said. “It’s time for us now to try to teach our people how to dress.”

By saying that, Holmes essentially called the majority of the black youth in his city a bunch of degenerates… because of how they wear their PANTS. He added further insult by saying the new law “might get rid of some of the crime on the street,” as if not wearing a belt increases one’s chance of becoming a criminal.

People sag their pants for various reasons — anything from trying to look like a gangsta to sudden rapid weight loss from AIDS. The only people that are affected by this are hypocritical assholes who think that they should be allowed to set standards for us all.

If every man with saggy pants is a criminal, then every pimp on a scooter blows children.

It is arguable that sagging pants are indecent. However, it is equally as sustainable that if you think sagging pants are indecent, then YOU need to lighten the fuck up.

An attorney for the American Civil Liberties Union of Florida put it best when he said, “Policymakers acting as ‘fashion police’ is a ridiculous waste of public resources. Laws like this disproportionately penalize African-American youth, increase contact between youth and law enforcement and will impose overly harsh penalties for victimless behavior.”

If you’re smart enough to understand what Mr. Lawyer said, then you should also agree. Unless someone is sagging commando with a visible bare ass, it’s fine. People grow up and they eventually start wearing pants that are more fitting. Let the cycle occur naturally.

Sources: 1