♪ On the first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me a pedophile at the Dollar Tree ♪

CALIFORNIA — 36-year-old Eugene Ramos doesn’t have a stereotypical pedophile mustache, but don’t be fooled — he still fucks kids. Ramos has a prior conviction for trying to rape a 7-year-old girl in 2003, but his most recent offense was even worse.

Unable to contain his sick lust for tiny illegal holes, Ramos kidnapped a 2-year-old girl at a Dollar Tree store, took her to the next aisle, and raped her on the floor.

The young victim had only left her grandma’s side for a moment before Ramos grabbed her. By the time she looked down the next aisle, it was too late. Ramos was on top of the toddler with his pants and underwear pulled down. Her pants and diaper were removed.

The grandma started screaming, and Ramos tried to flee the busy store. He ran into April Thomas, who grabbed his jacket. Everyone else stood around like pussies while Thomas struggled with the rapist. Eventually, she was overpowered and Ramos escaped.

Outside, Demario Hawkins and another man tackled Ramos to the ground and restrained him until the cops arrived. When reporters asked him why he helped, he replied, “I’m young, you know, why not? My grandma’s always tellin’ me, ‘You’re young; use your legs.’”

Ramos was charged with numerous sex offenses, including attempted sodomy on a child under 10 (apparently, it’s a LITTLE more acceptable to sodomize an 11-year-old).

Hopefully, there’s no “three strike” rule for child rape in California. Two is plenty.

Sources: 1