NEW YORK — Police officers responding to a domestic disturbance call in Jamestown this weekend were surprised to find a male victim suffering from multiple staple wounds to his forehead.

The attacker was Jodi Gilbert, a female acquaintance that the victim had a restraining order against. In a fit of psychotic rage, Gilbert struck him in the head several times with a Stanley Hammer Tacker.

Gilbert was mad because she found salt — big grains of salt — in her margarita.

A Stanley Hammer Tacker is a hammer-shaped stapler that carpenters use. Each time you strike a surface — in this case, a man’s forehead — a staple comes out. Depending on the surface, the staple will either penetrate or deflect. Luckily, staples puncture human flesh with ease.

The victim is recovering from punctures to both his forehead and ego, but he’ll be fine.

Gilbert was arrested on charges of aggravated criminal contempt and assault. Surprisingly, police took her to jail instead of back to the reptile sanctuary at the zoo where she had escaped from.

Sources: 1