TEXAS — On Monday evening in Dallas, a man driving an SUV crashed into another vehicle with three people inside. After the collision, the man climbed onto the roof of his own vehicle and got naked.

After helicoptering his penis around for a moment, the man hopped back into his SUV naked and drove away, but he lost control and crashed into a tree. Police declared him dead at the scene.

I wish he could’ve survived long enough to tell someone WHY he did that — mainly why he got naked after the first crash. I feel like there has been an unexplainable influx in nude crime recently.

The three victims from the first crash all survived and were treated for non-deadly injuries.

Coincidentally, the dead man’s name was Richard Roundtree. I would’ve mentioned that sooner, but I didn’t want you to think that I was talking about the actor who played Shaft and get distracted.

What do you think: Alcohol, PCP, or Alzheimer’s?

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